When the new year begins - are we going to be happy because the world told us to be?
#HAPPYFRIDAY, Ladies!
I have been thinking a lot (way too much), and "Get Out of Your Head - Ms.K" is the energy I want to bring more of into my life this year. Be happy for this moment. This moment is your life. Omar Khayyám
Reading UNFU*K YOURSELF by Gary John Bishop is also helping.
We tell others to have a #happynewyear, and it has been interesting to see that in more conversations than one, the notion of happiness is starting to be harder to embrace. It is evident that the pandemic has not been kind to the world, and brought up a ton of mixed emotions and feelings - this is totally NATURAL by the way! #bekindtoyourself
Have you ever felt like a hamster on a wheel, furiously churing your way through life but somehow going nowhere? Do not worry. #youarenotalone https://garyjohnbishop.com/unfucknation/
The biggest learning for me in my journey has been the acknowledgement and validation that #happiness can be simple. Ha. I have been researching happiness for decades, always on a quest - and not understanding how simple it can really be. Think of my ideas as your first action steps so you can begin to have a different inner dialogue with yourself AND just remember; the conversations we have with ourselves matter the most.
So, as we start the new year - Here are my three simple thoughts on Happiness
1. Happiness is a product of stability, mental balance, and the ability to be objective. The essence of happiness can develop from this space of clarity and composure, which I call a feeling of inner peace. A type of peace that is not controlled or defined by external events so one can move with the waves of life without getting overwhelmed or tossed around. Easier said than done, but every day is a new day - and we always start with a clean slate. Here is an action step to consider. Instead of living with doubt, ask yourself: What can I do differently today?
2. Happiness can multiply and enhance the finer mental qualities that make life beautiful, like being able to love yourself and others or seeing more perspectives than just your own. At its core, happiness is accepting reality and appreciating the moment's miracle without getting lost in craving for more. I know this was/is a big life lesson for me, especially with an addict brain that constantly craves more.
3. At times, happiness is also confused with the sensation of pleasure. Whenever we come in contact with something agreeable, a subtle, pleasant feeling will move through the body, and we react to it with craving. The problem with pleasure is that it quickly becomes an endless chase, where we keep trying to place ourselves in situations that give us the feelings we are attached to. The feeling I wanted to remain connected to was numbness. I have always had big emotions, and as I got older, to 'control' those, I needed to drink to numb them away. Or hence I thought - not feeling anything would allow me to escape reality. #trusttheprocess
Imagine.
What would be possible if we were able to link happiness and gratitude? Placing gratitude at the core of how we think, act, and feel? I am a huge believer in the parallels between joy and gratitude, and I am incredibly grateful for everything in my life. #gratitude
While I may not say out loud that I am happy a lot, I do say that I am grateful all day/every day and this is #thisislegacymindset
So what changed the happiness game for me? Awareness.
Awareness is what has helped me break my unconscious habit patterns. Similarly, training my mind to become comfortable in the present moment has allowed me to get out of my imaginary negativity.
All we can do is embrace the now by getting comfortable and turning our attention inward to start living in a new way. When we become aware of our ups and downs, we begin to grow and we slowly learn how to celebrate ourselves. Celebrate the small wins so you can learn to appreciate the big wins.
Tip of the Day - Read a book for 10-min and enjoy life as it is TODAY.
UNFU*CK YOURSELF by Gary John Bishop is a gem of a starting place.
XOXO, Ms. K
The comment of how simple happiness can be is so on point. Abraham Lincoln said a man chooses how happy he will be. Find one small thing to start with…the ability to read or heat on a cold winters day…chose.